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The Fernando Torres Report - No. 11 - 21 January 2012 - Norwich

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The latest edition of The Fernando Torres Report is here! In this column, I offer my perspective on the £50m man and his team! Today, I look at yesterday's Premier League match against Norwich City.

Oh, man. If there has ever been an edition of The Fernando Torres Report I didn't want to write, it's been this one. In truth, I've never been more certain that my opinion will be viewed with derision than right now. Yesterday's match, both for Chelsea and for Fernando Torres, was perfect fodder for overreaction. Not that either was particularly great or free from sin, but they also weren't worth the anger directed towards them in the heat of yesterday's draw. Ultimately, we've gained over our London rivals. Of course, we've not gained as much as we could have, but if the two points are life and death already, we don't deserve fourth place. To get back on the topic of this article, Fernando Torres, yesterday's match was in no way the disaster it's become in the minds of some. Sure, he could have been better, like most of our players yesterday, but that performance didn't undo all of the progress he's been making recently.

Star-divide

You'd honestly think most Chelsea fans had walked in on Fernando Torres and their mother in bed after yesterday's match, and I, frankly, can't see why. The entire team were having a bit of an off day, not helped by the Norwich defence with easily one of their best performances of the season. Sadly for us, their defence was having one of those games marked not by particularly obvious good defending, but the sort of defending that renders the opposition attack anonymous. Fernando Torres, like most attackers, is rendered all but useless by that sort of defence, and it showed. As much as he lacked a cutting edge today, he was pretty well neutralized.

Chelsea only managed a few decent chances today, and most ended up in the hands of Drogba-slayer John Ruddy. The one which didn't came to Torres in the box, who, after struggling to get the ball out from his feet poked the ball wide of the post at close range. This miss was the one which caused the reaction against Fernando yesterday, with many taking the view that it was as bad as the one which was the genesis of this column. I very much disagreed, and still do. As far as I'm concerned, while Torres should have done better, it was the sort of miss every striker has ten times a season. It was certainly a significant moment in the match, as it was easily our best chance, but it was the sort of miss that happens all the time. Sometimes, the ball just gets caught in a players feet and spoils the chance.

The sad part for me isn't the fact that people were and still are venting their frustrations on Fernando Torres, it's that they're doing it for the wrong reason. The biggest problem I saw with Nando's game yesterday was not that he couldn't finish a chance that looked easier than it was. It was that he looked lost at times. He wasn't quite as sharp as he has been of late, even accounting for the lack of sharpness of the entire team and the good performance from Norwich's defence. Fernando was failing to make the runs into good positions and with the ball that have marked his recent run of decent form. Nando's other good chance was a good example of this. He received the ball from Ramires, but couldn't get into a good position, and was forced into a curling shot from the edge of the area which couldn't beat Ruddy, who saved it pretty easily.

All in all, yesterday's match was disappointing for Fernando, as evidenced by his being brought off for Lukaku in the seventy-seventh minute, but it was hardly piss-poor. I think there is a danger of making more of yesterday's match than is there to be made, both for Torres and Chelsea. I think it was one of those off days every team has from time to time combined with a stubborn defence to get a 0-0 draw. It happens. I don't think we can make any long-term judgements from this match. Both the team and player have been on poor streaks this season, but have recently improved again[, and I'm not sure they're unrelated]. Both Chelsea and Fernando Torres should be judged on a match-by-match basis at this point, after their poor runs of form, as their form differs match to match. If nothing else, keeping a cool head rather than jumping between complete optimism every time either has a decent game and complete pessimism when they don't is much better for your mental health.

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LOL...

What a pile of rubbish.

by Mourinho on Jan 22, 2012 7:37 PM GMT reply actions  

Again...

This is just dumb. I don’t agree with anything you wrote so I made one snide comment, why harp on it? why not try and address what I’ve said since?

by Mourinho on Jan 22, 2012 8:41 PM GMT up reply actions  

Well a good start would have been

giving reasons why you disagree. You just said it was sh*t and didn’t give any reasons or sort of explanation.

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 22, 2012 8:44 PM GMT up reply actions  

Let's let it go now guys

It’s a (valid) difference of opinion, so let’s focus on that rather than the way the conversation started

by Graham MacAree on Jan 22, 2012 8:45 PM GMT up reply actions  

Did you just

registered for a site yesterday and now come out to yell “rubbish” at one article of the same site a day later? Ooooh

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 22, 2012 7:53 PM GMT up reply actions  

Not only that

But an article written by a generally well respected, long-term member.

I wonder whose side people are likely to take on this one.

by deg0ey on Jan 22, 2012 8:06 PM GMT up reply actions  

Maybe I'm too old-fashioned

but I really believe if you bother to sign up for a site to comment you do it because you like to talk to those people writing for this site. Calling their articles rubbish isn’t exactly a sign for that … may I wonder

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 22, 2012 8:09 PM GMT up reply actions  

I like when people offer constructive criticism of a post as it tends to spark some excellent discussion

This doesn’t do any of that. If you have a point to make please feel free to make it. This doesn’t do that.

by Stephen Schmidt on Jan 22, 2012 8:39 PM GMT up reply actions  

sick of Fernando apologists

Its so lame the guy has done absolutely nothing for Chelsea FC and you continue to try and find these little pieces in an attempt to shine up a turd… The guy is a massive disappointment and with all the negativity that’s thrown and guys like Mikel, Sturridge, Kalou, Drogba, Malouda and I know I’m forgetting someone…LUIZ! You would think someone would acknowledge how terrible he’s been! You don’t see the Scousers coddling Carroll, he’s been abysmal and if you talk to them they will say as much.

The sooner you can come to grips with the fact the guy is a complete bust the sooner we can start talking about the positives the club has moving forward… Enough with this coddling crap he’s a scouser for life!

by Mourinho on Jan 22, 2012 8:12 PM GMT reply actions  

I'm pretty sure we have at least one Kalou apologist, one Mikel apologist...

at least three Malouda fans, a healthy respect for Drogba and Sturridge, and an unhealthy love for David Luiz.

Author and Official Fernando Torres Apologist for We Ain't Got No History!

by Kevin Kostka on Jan 22, 2012 8:24 PM GMT up reply actions  

And about 50,000,000 Torres apologists...

ridiculous. I don’t even have to draw bring up what the names mentioned have done for the club over the years…

by Mourinho on Jan 22, 2012 8:30 PM GMT up reply actions  

I have an idea.

If we have 50,000,000 we can start a collection. If everyone donates a pound to Chelsea we can get the money back!

by Kjell on Jan 23, 2012 6:09 AM GMT up reply actions  

Dammit I fall in all those categories

Only thing missing is a Bosingwa apologist! Any takers? :D

by Avinash Mohan on Jan 22, 2012 8:56 PM GMT via mobile up reply actions  

Feel free to take it if you want.

I basically claimed my title for myself.

Author and Official Fernando Torres Apologist for We Ain't Got No History!

by Kevin Kostka on Jan 22, 2012 9:00 PM GMT up reply actions  

I wanna be Lampard apologist

but I’m not 1/10 as eloquent as Kevin, so obviously I will never qualify as an apologist :P

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 22, 2012 9:02 PM GMT up reply actions  

As long as you're at least writing comments, and trying to get people to...

…take a second look at things they think are settled, you’re an apologist to me.

Author and Official Fernando Torres Apologist for We Ain't Got No History!

by Kevin Kostka on Jan 22, 2012 9:14 PM GMT up reply actions  

Why so do I always have the impression my comments tend to

upset people? :D

Alright, though I think due to my attitude “the more I love one player the more I tend to criticize him (unfairly) sometimes” I can never be a proper apologist :(

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 22, 2012 9:24 PM GMT up reply actions  

Do I have permission to be a Petr Cech apologist?

Seems easy.

5 Up, 5 Down - A uniquely unofficial look at the comings and goings of Chelsea FC and the EPL

by CanadianBlue on Jan 23, 2012 12:37 AM GMT up reply actions  

Given his form at times this season?

We could probably use a Petr Cech apologist!

by conorjmartin on Jan 23, 2012 2:36 AM GMT up reply actions  

You are also torn

between defending a player – die-hard! and rant-rant-rant?

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 23, 2012 10:05 AM GMT up reply actions  

Oh no no no

Far too frustrating. I can just see what you went through to write this,imagine doing a Bosingwa report. Though, I admit, I still have a soft corner for him. He was great before the injuries,but even now he sometimes does awesome stuff-CB at Spurs,anyone?

by Avinash Mohan on Jan 22, 2012 9:16 PM GMT via mobile up reply actions  

Like I said above...

…you don’t have to write reports. Just defend him when people talk crap about him in comments. Be advised, though, I will start calling you Bossman. : )

Author and Official Fernando Torres Apologist for We Ain't Got No History!

by Kevin Kostka on Jan 22, 2012 9:18 PM GMT up reply actions  

I have found my calling in life

From hereon in,I will defend the BOSSMAN!!!

by Avinash Mohan on Jan 23, 2012 2:25 PM GMT up reply actions  

Actually

I think DPeezy may have picked him some time ago… I can’t remember if he settled on Kalou or Bosingwa, but I feel like he did a post about the Bossman.

by alynne4307 on Jan 23, 2012 3:00 PM GMT up reply actions  

You think Bosingwa is unfairly maligned?

I just don’t think he adds anything to the team. He crosses to a team that can’t get on the end of them and fails to help cover defensively.

I’d replace him with Ivan. Our resident Serb has gotten a ton of stick this season. :(

by Culain on Jan 23, 2012 7:32 PM GMT up reply actions  

Ivanovic has sucked in central defense but has done well at right back

But he’s had 1 really good game (his first one at RB); he has not been spectacular by any means.

We all know Bosingwa’s shortcomings, since they get pointed out ad nauseum while the times when he shines on the field get ignored or fogotten amazingly quick. He was fantastic v. Man City and Spurs. Man of the match v. WBA in our second game of the season.

He is good for about 1 excellent cross a game (out of like 10, of course). He had 2 v. Norwich, one of which was bungled wide by Torres (yeah, THAT one). He has speed to burn, but at least he’s willing to take on and run at people usually. (Usually.) He’s often lazy in defense, and plays with poor awareness of action & players not directly in his line of sight. He defends the cross pretty well, mainly due to his speed. He leads the team in total interceptions (2nd to DL in per-game average) and is better in almost every single defensive statistic than his counterpart on the left side. He is the best right back we have on the squad.

by DPeezy on Jan 23, 2012 9:27 PM GMT up reply actions  

I don't think anyone has forgotten his performances to start the season

or his excellent job as a CB. He’s not a bad player, and I don’t even think he’s lazy defensively (I think his awareness/decision making is abysmal) but I don’t fault the overall effort.

I just don’t think he does what this current team needs a right back to do. We’re a horrific, horrific crossing team. So for him to bomb forward and then put a cross in…it just doesn’t convert to an attempt on goal very often.

I know we want to play pressing possession football, and I think that’s what he’s good at. And he does do an excellent job of pinning the opposition players back. But we’re not solid enough as a pressing possession team for him to do well.

If he was great against the counter I’d love him, but he’s not.

But Ivan’s lack of anything offensive really has hurt us in the past, especially against Utd.

by Culain on Jan 23, 2012 10:00 PM GMT up reply actions  

I feel for Bosingwa

he seems like he seriously just doesnt understand anything… like it’s a big old world out there that doesn’t make sense to him. Somehow, I guess I have made him out to be a small child in my head.

by alynne4307 on Jan 22, 2012 10:02 PM GMT up reply actions  

hahaha...

Fair enough. I hope you see where I’m coming from though… Don’t accept mediocrity when a player who’s paid wages like Torres doesn’t produce he needs to know this isn’t acceptable. Coddling him is a complete waste of time

by Mourinho on Jan 22, 2012 8:43 PM GMT up reply actions  

Holding his salary against him doesn't really do any good either

His wages could certainly be spent more efficiently elsewhere, and I don’t think anyone here would argue with that at all. For better or worse he’s here for the time being. When looking at his performance we really need to ignore his paycheck and look strictly at what he did on the field. Center forwards more than any other position are heavily reliant on the other 9 outfield players for any sort of success. That’s why soccernomics devoted a whole chapter to how bad an idea spending big on a center forward is. This is really a pretty decent evaluation in my eyes of Fernando’s individual performance. Some better over the top balls in the early minutes from our midfield could easily have us calling Torres MotM.

by Stephen Schmidt on Jan 22, 2012 8:49 PM GMT up reply actions  

Hitting the net from 5 yards out

probably would’ve gotten him MotM too ifs and buts…

Seriously guys and gals this guy needs to score goals I don’t think I’m nitpicking by say as much either.

by Mourinho on Jan 22, 2012 8:56 PM GMT up reply actions  

No...

you aren’t… you are stating the obvious. And stating it doesnt change things.

by alynne4307 on Jan 22, 2012 8:58 PM GMT up reply actions  

If "coddling" leads a few more fans supporting him, it's going to help, even if...

…it’s not much. Look at the Sunderland match. The fans were chanting for him all match and he had his best performance. I’m not saying it’ll really help, but being negative definitely won’t.

Author and Official Fernando Torres Apologist for We Ain't Got No History!

by Kevin Kostka on Jan 22, 2012 9:07 PM GMT up reply actions  

How do you know?

Maybe some tough love is all he needs… Maybe he needs to know that the honeymoon is over and we’re not going to accept mediocre performances for this long. Maybe that will serve as the catalyst for him to find form again? We’ve already tried it your way and its failed.

by Mourinho on Jan 22, 2012 9:15 PM GMT up reply actions  

His problem is not that we'll accept any performance.

I’m also not trying to get people to cheer failure. I’m trying to get people to notice the positives as well as the negatives that end up in the headlines. Once opinion turns completely against him, as it did with Sheva, he’ll be sold, rather than spurred onto better things. To be honest, I wouldn’t be surprised if that happens in the next year, but until it happens, we should support him.

Author and Official Fernando Torres Apologist for We Ain't Got No History!

by Kevin Kostka on Jan 22, 2012 9:22 PM GMT up reply actions  

Let's not have the decision to put him on booed

it’s not a good look no matter how terrible the player is.

by Sabrina Dessipe on Jan 22, 2012 9:24 PM GMT up reply actions  

Never Boo your players...

The Gunners supporters should be ashamed of themselves for Booing Ashavin when he was introduced… Lame ass supporters for sure. I am never gonna be an advocate for booing but I am certainly NOT in favour of coddling either.

by Mourinho on Jan 22, 2012 9:26 PM GMT up reply actions  

To be honest, I'd have booed taking Chamberlain off.

He’s one of the players I’d keep at Charsenal.

Author and Official Fernando Torres Apologist for We Ain't Got No History!

by Kevin Kostka on Jan 22, 2012 9:29 PM GMT up reply actions  

I'm sure he hears plenty of negativity

That’s about all the English press has published on the subject. He missed a chance yesterday that more often than not would have found the net. Shit happens. RvP missed a far easier one today. Shit happens. Welbeck could have added a third for United and fell over the ball. Shit happens. What smarter fans should do is focus less on the goals and more on the creation of chances. He’s been very good for the last few weeks before having a very mediocre game yesterday. Going scouse on him isn’t going to help as the past year worth of treatment should show us.

by Stephen Schmidt on Jan 22, 2012 9:25 PM GMT up reply actions   2 recs

The English press always write negativity

about the Blues, its normal! And i’m not advocating joining in and bashing him or booing him on the pitch. What i am saying is coddling and writing these reports highlighting how he really wasn’t all that bad is just ridiculous!

by Mourinho on Jan 22, 2012 9:28 PM GMT up reply actions  

These reports are going up because he was on the pitch for 77 minutes

Anything else you read about Torres participation yesterday probably boils down to a single shot that missed the mark.

by Stephen Schmidt on Jan 22, 2012 9:30 PM GMT up reply actions  

What gets me..

…is that you’re putting way to much energy into bashing these reports. If you don’t like them, think they’re stupid whatever…just don’t read, comment and move on to a article that you might actually like.

Follow me on twitter@PrixFixeOnline
Staff writer for Managing Madrid & Sounder At Heart

by Timm Higgins on Jan 23, 2012 3:02 AM GMT up reply actions  

"Going scouse on him..."

I actually think goals are important but the creation of chances shouldn’t be ignored either.

by Sabrina Dessipe on Jan 22, 2012 9:29 PM GMT up reply actions  

If only a fraction of his reactions in interviews are true

he is well aware he’s not performing well enough. I don’t think he needs more love or to wake up.

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 22, 2012 9:26 PM GMT up reply actions  

If you're coming up with a comparison

wages vs. benefit we could also go on endlessly about Malouda … he isn’t on low wages and is mostly sitting on the bench. But it doesn’t make much sense

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 22, 2012 8:56 PM GMT up reply actions  

Malouda has done more than enough for the team

Even in a limited role he still finds a way to contribute. He has Mata ahead of him and there is no way he’s going to beat out Juan with us so desperately needing creativity. Still he has scored some key goals for us…

by Mourinho on Jan 22, 2012 8:58 PM GMT up reply actions  

When we're talking about wages

it doesn’t make too much sense to try to work out the justification or value by past contributions because wages are paid for the present, not past achievements. Saying Malouda deserves that salary because he has done enough in the past doesn’t make it a better argument, that’s why benefit based on wages isn’t fruitful

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 22, 2012 9:00 PM GMT up reply actions  

Not past contributions

Malouda has been good this year too in a limited role. He’s just not getting a regular run out with the squad

by Mourinho on Jan 22, 2012 9:06 PM GMT up reply actions  

Regardless of how we should evaluate Malouda's contributions

because that’s largely subjective and what I think Malouda’s worth or not – a backup player on the bench shouldn’t be on high salary, or on higher salary than a first team regular starter (Mata)

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 22, 2012 9:08 PM GMT up reply actions  

He earned that salary based on what he did AT CHELSEA!

Whether or not he’s worth it not is neither here nor there his performances warranted the contract at the time

by Mourinho on Jan 22, 2012 9:16 PM GMT up reply actions  

Sigh

And someone gave Torres a ridiculously large contract at Chelsea based on what he’d done at Liverpool. He was a transfer. Facts are facts… sorry those goals in the seasons prior weren’t for Chelsea.

I don’t get taking out a business decision that a board made on the player or the fans. It’s as if you think that Torres or his followers went in and held Abromovich ransom. Heck- they probably offered him that salary outright and barely had to negotiate (his deal was done in a day while Cahill’s took weeks).

by alynne4307 on Jan 22, 2012 9:27 PM GMT up reply actions  

That's probably where half this

pre-conceived hate comes from. Which is fine if people would just admit it, lol.

by alynne4307 on Jan 22, 2012 9:42 PM GMT up reply actions  

HAHA!

I don’t hate him I just want to see him firing in goals and as supporters we shouldn’t be finding every excuse in the book to cover up for poor play

by Mourinho on Jan 22, 2012 9:47 PM GMT up reply actions  

Hating ... not hating ... supporting ...

is no contradictory, I’ve gone through this myself :P

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 22, 2012 9:49 PM GMT up reply actions  

And there in lies the error...

Let’s face it Torres was Romans second vanity buy. No club in the World wanted him on the form he was on after the injuries. Nevertheless he is here now and not doing a damn thing.

by Mourinho on Jan 22, 2012 9:35 PM GMT up reply actions  

So it was a mistake to sign him at all, with this kind or transfer fee

and that kind of salary package. On that I can agree with, but as GlaDOS is singing: “Cause there’s no sense crying over every mistake”. A lot of fans and me have cried and mourned about this January last year, but one year later doing the same is fruitless as well

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 22, 2012 9:41 PM GMT up reply actions  

Hell, I agree with that. : )

I don’t argue that it he’s been successful here, just that going on about it isn’t going to help.

Author and Official Fernando Torres Apologist for We Ain't Got No History!

by Kevin Kostka on Jan 22, 2012 9:45 PM GMT up reply actions  

For a second I thought you wanna sing that song with me :P

Ah Kevin! What did you do again! In wanted to fight some "matches in DotA and instead, I spent all my time here in your thread … defending Torres? Do I really do that? Maker’s breath!

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 22, 2012 9:47 PM GMT up reply actions  

Agreed...

I’m just not with coddling either. Making it appear like this is still a decent bit of business because he has 10 assists…

by Mourinho on Jan 22, 2012 9:46 PM GMT up reply actions  

If you go back and read my other Torres Reports...

…you’ll see I’ve called him a waste of money several times.

Author and Official Fernando Torres Apologist for We Ain't Got No History!

by Kevin Kostka on Jan 22, 2012 9:50 PM GMT up reply actions  

So all you say is now

at the time he signed the contract he was worth the money he’s paid currently for his salaries? Then you apply double standards. Because at the time Torres signed his contract the Chelsea management surely thought too he was worth his salaries, otherwise they wouldn’t have signed the contract. You might have missed it, but it needs to parties to sign a contract

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 22, 2012 9:29 PM GMT up reply actions  

So if I follow your own argument

the same applies for Torres as well. You basically say Torres isn’t worth what he earns.

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 22, 2012 9:40 PM GMT up reply actions  

Torres should be in his prime.

When Malouda was awarded that contract he fulfilled it…

by Mourinho on Jan 22, 2012 9:48 PM GMT up reply actions  

Is there a absolute scale to define

when a player should hit his prime and when not?

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 22, 2012 9:50 PM GMT up reply actions  

It's usually about 26-31, a bit later for defenders and...

…much later for keepers.

Author and Official Fernando Torres Apologist for We Ain't Got No History!

by Kevin Kostka on Jan 22, 2012 9:52 PM GMT up reply actions  

So we measure "prime" by age only

and if a player peaks earlier or later – his problem. Is it that easy?

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 22, 2012 9:58 PM GMT up reply actions  

It's usually, so there obviously outliers.

Look at Ryan Giggs, who peaked about 34.

Author and Official Fernando Torres Apologist for We Ain't Got No History!

by Kevin Kostka on Jan 22, 2012 10:00 PM GMT up reply actions  

Exactly

so I can return to my initial point: saying who “should” or “should not” be in his prime is useless

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 22, 2012 10:04 PM GMT up reply actions  

It's only really useful for prospects anyway.

You can also use it to determine how long a player has left. Most of the time, determining a player’s prime is done on a player-by-player basis.

Author and Official Fernando Torres Apologist for We Ain't Got No History!

by Kevin Kostka on Jan 22, 2012 10:08 PM GMT up reply actions  

I should add

mostly defining the primes of players is done in hindsight. So it’s easy to do that for Malouda, Drogba or Lampard. For Torres … well … not

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 22, 2012 10:12 PM GMT up reply actions  

And that's why

comparing perceived benefit vs. wages isn’t doing good at all

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 22, 2012 9:08 PM GMT up reply actions  

Wait...

You’re suggesting Malouda has been good this year in his opportunities, and suggesting that people are coddling Torres?

Now it all makes sense… or not.

Neither has been good this year. They have their positives that we take from matches, if you’d read game threads and the analysis afterwards. But on overall performance and contributions, Malouda has by far and away botched a lot of his chances to help the team. Obviously, this discussion isn’t going anywhere because it seems you’re pre-conceived notions of the players is going to win out, and that’s fine. You just might find some folks on this blog that will disagree with you.

by alynne4307 on Jan 22, 2012 9:12 PM GMT up reply actions  

Given his relevance to the team I think malouda's been fine.

He’s not a key component to the set up anymore he’s a rotational squad player.

by Mourinho on Jan 22, 2012 9:18 PM GMT up reply actions  

But Torres, with more than 10 assists this year, has done more than Malouda.

If you’re going to bring up who gives us the most benefit and takes away the least by preventing another playing in his position, Torres is a much greater asset than Malouda right now. Malouda has done a lot for us, over his career, and Torres really hasn’t, but when you compare their effectiveness this season Torres has been more valuable for us, though neither has been particularly great.

Author and Official Fernando Torres Apologist for We Ain't Got No History!

by Kevin Kostka on Jan 22, 2012 9:04 PM GMT up reply actions  

You offering us RVP?

you could come hop on over to the dark side and troll Arsenal instead!

by alynne4307 on Jan 22, 2012 9:08 PM GMT up reply actions  

Stop trolling Sabrina!

God, you Arsenal fans really need to learn your place

by deg0ey on Jan 22, 2012 9:13 PM GMT up reply actions  

ROFL

Literally. I’m rolling all laughing :D

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 22, 2012 9:15 PM GMT up reply actions  

I think it was more of an endearing label

in your case, since you do support another team. Not sure DPeezy’s on this thread anyhow…

You’re not just any troll, you’re OUR troll :) Awww!

by alynne4307 on Jan 22, 2012 9:16 PM GMT up reply actions  

If there were any real value at striker out there, I'd think about it.

Maybe we should get that Charsenal thing going. : )

Author and Official Fernando Torres Apologist for We Ain't Got No History!

by Kevin Kostka on Jan 22, 2012 9:09 PM GMT up reply actions  

You mean the most fearsome badge on the planet

Seriously, a lion with a cannon? That’s pretty lethal

by deg0ey on Jan 22, 2012 9:23 PM GMT up reply actions  

Yeah

I’m sure glad we don’t have a cock on our badges…

by deg0ey on Jan 22, 2012 9:27 PM GMT up reply actions  

While that would be pretty cool

the thought of this weird offspring of clubs is terrifying me.

by alynne4307 on Jan 22, 2012 9:29 PM GMT up reply actions  

Nauseating....

……really, I like the contributions you guys have made to this site, but this is shocking.

by ososdeoro on Jan 23, 2012 4:55 AM GMT up reply actions  

Yes he has picked up some assists... More than Florent

Malouda has struggled to find form this season but has fulfilled his duties at CFC. he’s 32 how many more killer seasons is he expected to have?

by Mourinho on Jan 22, 2012 9:08 PM GMT up reply actions  

Basically you said it yourself

why paying a guy who struggled to find form this season a high salary? You don’t pay anyone based on your past merits

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 22, 2012 9:10 PM GMT up reply actions  

NO choice in the matter now

When he was in his prime(when we signed him) the contract warranted years past his expiration. We basically gave him a year or two past his expiration date in order to keep him here for his prime years. Its sort of what is going on with Drogba right now only we aren’t willing to give him 2 yrs.

by Mourinho on Jan 22, 2012 9:40 PM GMT up reply actions  

So you agree that Malouda isn't worth his current salary

and just at the time he signed his contract we just didn’t see it

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 22, 2012 9:42 PM GMT up reply actions  

Like I said in another post

He’s earned that salary based on what he did at CHelsea. Whether or not he’s worth it now is moot. Also given his role on the squad I say he’s been decent. He’s not a key player for the team anymore.

by Mourinho on Jan 22, 2012 9:21 PM GMT up reply actions  

Double standards

I’ve written about that already above, see there

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 22, 2012 9:32 PM GMT up reply actions  

He doesn't read the blog or anything.

The reason I write these is to point out that there are positives to his performances a lot of people overlook, not to pretend his time here has been a success. I know he’s not an efficient use of money, but he’s our player, and I’m trying to see the positives.

Author and Official Fernando Torres Apologist for We Ain't Got No History!

by Kevin Kostka on Jan 22, 2012 8:57 PM GMT up reply actions  

Also the whole team has been strugling for a year now

Is it only me that thinks it’s more than coincidence that Torres has been playing well for 18 months and in the last 18 months has been playing for a poor Liverpool side followed by a poor Chelsea side?

I understand he hasn’t been amazing but I don’t think he’s the only bad player in an overall good side. We don’t have anyone else to lead the line yet really. I think Danny is a couple of years away from being a regular CF and I think Lukaku is also a few years away.

No point buying anyone else in the CF position because we technically have enough quality. We just need Nando to get back to his best. He’s still the guy that could impossibly score from any angle. It’s the most obvious thing to point out but he must have zero confidence right now. If I went from scoring effortlessly week in week out to rarely scoring I’d be running low on confidence. I think it’s pointless to feel sorry for ourselves and I don;t think that Chelsea playing poorly for over a year should be blamed on one player.

by Famouscfc on Jan 22, 2012 9:05 PM GMT up reply actions  

I do think it's not a complete coincidence that the team's...

…form and Nando’s usually follow the same trajectory.

Author and Official Fernando Torres Apologist for We Ain't Got No History!

by Kevin Kostka on Jan 22, 2012 9:10 PM GMT up reply actions  

Neither is helping the other

but it’s not like the chance don’t come. Someone has to finish them usually the striker.

by Sabrina Dessipe on Jan 22, 2012 9:13 PM GMT up reply actions  

I find this post to be a bit confusing...

You need to berate a player because of their poor performance, to look at the positives elsewhere? And you are pissed because people have berated other players that may perform poorly at a time, and you are standing up in their defense?

The logic isnt there. We often joke about players on here… and some even flat out support the sale of some of them… but most of the fans here remain pretty respectful of them in the end.

by alynne4307 on Jan 22, 2012 8:47 PM GMT up reply actions  

Not Berate

but acknowledge. He has been piss poor for a year now and people keep defending him like they aren’t paying attention to what is happening on the pitch or in the standings. A strikers main objective is to score goals, when you go 15 or so games without doing so one can only expect there to be a backlash.

Hell, the guy doesn’t even make the keeper work more often than not!

by Mourinho on Jan 22, 2012 8:53 PM GMT up reply actions  

No one has denied he's had a poor year

or a pretty poor season, and hasn’t been scoring. No one really denied that he should have buried that chance yesterday in the box. People are looking realistically at his entire 90 minutes and saying it was disapppointing and not his best. What do you want?

It sounds like you want every Chelsea fans to write Abromovich a letter asking him to pretty please sell him this month. If that’s the case, I am sure you could get a bunch on that petition. But, as Stephen said, for better or worse he is here now, so why continue to cause yourself anguish over it?

by alynne4307 on Jan 22, 2012 8:57 PM GMT up reply actions  

There were a lot of talks about Torres' miss yesterday

not only in the WAGNH gamethread, but also elsewhere on various Chelsea sites; there was one particular brawl going on in the gamethread yesterday in which I participated, seemingly not knowing myself which side I took … and maybe I took no side at all. In the heat of the disappointment yesterday, all negativity at Torres may have looked all the same. As you brought up the same sentiment in your article again, I might add: this reaction doesn’t stem from pure disgust or blind hatred only. It is an overreaction, maybe, to say “this miss cost us 2 points” – but then, that’s always the case, not only when Torres misfired. If a team doesn’t manage to play well enough to compensate for one single miss … then by no way it was only the miss, and nothing else.

That said, it’s true strikers have their fair share of misses, even horrible ones. It’s somewhat unfruitful to discuss rationally about how horrible a miss – this is largely subjective, like discussing MOTM or best goal of the season. And it’s true reactions are especially harsh when Torres misses them. But Torres has a collection of unbelievable misses to his name – deservedly or undeservedly so. I’m not only talking of “the misses” like the Manure one, or yesterday, because then it would only be handful (and even less). Torres had his fair share of misfortune this season – he had very good attempts blocked by tremendous saves by keepers, hit the bar, the GK numerous times combined. All those things have one thing in common: they generate disappointments and frustrations, and a chance not converted. Now sadly, goals win the games, and perception varies the more so if a striker, like Torres, doesn’t so often for whatever reason; not scoring for a striker is perceived a sin, not scoring often an even bigger one. If a striker scores on a regular basis – say he misses terribly and makes up for it a match later fans are likely to forgive him. If like Torres, they are not.

I’m not really talking about what’s fair or unfair, what’s rational and what’s not. Reacting to Torres’ misses – like talking about Luiz’ mistakes, or Lampard’s imperfections, Sturridge’s crossing – is indeed too much bound to who is actually talking, and if he/she likes Torres personally (and not the kind of liking because he’s a Chelsea player and of course a Chelsea fan likes all Chelsea players), or not, making it nearly impossible to talk about that topic neutrally.

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 22, 2012 8:40 PM GMT reply actions   2 recs

We are struggling to deliver the final ball.

With that said when opportunities like the ones yesterday fall to our “prized” striker you HAVE to take them! Watch Chelsea TV on Friday and pretty much everyone talking about the game has mentioned that Torres has to score goals! No more messing about with this lame ass “oh well he occupied good space today!” " he looked like he was lively today!" He needs to bury opportunities nuff said and until he does that we as supporters have EVERY reason to be disappointed.

FInding every excuse in the book to defend him is just ignoring the obvious.

by Mourinho on Jan 22, 2012 8:51 PM GMT up reply actions  

Since you replied to my comment

I have to assume what you’ve written is meant as a response to my comment, but it seems you didn’t read what I’ve written, or misunderstood. Never mind

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 22, 2012 8:53 PM GMT up reply actions  

Its part of the game

Sure,he’s a striker we paid big money for,and yeah he fluffed one chance-but apart from that,he had a decent game. You’re not gonna tell me every ‘prized’ striker buries each opportunity,right? Rooney,RvP, Milito,Villa,etc etc have all missed sitters in their time. IIRC Villa had a long goalless streak for Barcelona this season too-a team which creates chances galore,and critics are still muted about it. Why? Cuz they win. I think that Nando’s troubles are waaayy too overblown in the media because they directly link it to Chelsea not winning,rather than blame the team not performing as a whole. We don’t ‘coddle’ him either,he gets his fair share of criticism-check the game threads. But we see that he’s getting better-he took his own sweet time to adjust to our style of play,but he’s finding his feet nonetheless,and that can only be a good sign of things to come. Sorry if we’re a lot more positive about our striker than the scousers are about Carroll.

by Avinash Mohan on Jan 22, 2012 9:07 PM GMT via mobile up reply actions  

Look at RVP today.

His miss was far worse than anything Torres has done this season. Of course, Arsenal were able to get him a chance to make up for it, unlike Chelsea yesterday.

Author and Official Fernando Torres Apologist for We Ain't Got No History!

by Kevin Kostka on Jan 22, 2012 9:12 PM GMT up reply actions  

I was actually righting a long post to say just that

The difference with RvP is he’ll miss but we know he’ll score to make up for it if not in that game then the next but with Torres there is not such expectation because you can give him 10 chances but he won’t score.

He missed a pretty easy shot today then scored what was a pretty difficult goal. It went through the legs of a defender and under Lindegaard

by Sabrina Dessipe on Jan 22, 2012 9:16 PM GMT up reply actions  

There haven't been games when Torres gets a lot of chances

I noticed the same thing in the Chelsea-Man U match…like what you said about RvP? Torres was looking good-scores an absolutely awesome goal over De Gay,before the miss…sorta like RvP’s case,but in reverse. :P point is,I’m sure if Torres gets more than 1-2 clear-cut chances to score in a game,he’s liable to take at least one. If we give him one per game and expect him to bury it,its a bit too much.

by Avinash Mohan on Jan 22, 2012 9:26 PM GMT via mobile up reply actions  

I dunno about that...

What’s his shot to goal ratio? I’m sure it isn’t 50-50… What about shot to SOG? He usually get’s more than one chance to score.

by Sabrina Dessipe on Jan 22, 2012 9:31 PM GMT up reply actions  

If you take out all the marginal chances nobody really scores regularly...

…it ends up as one or two quality chances per game.

Author and Official Fernando Torres Apologist for We Ain't Got No History!

by Kevin Kostka on Jan 22, 2012 9:33 PM GMT up reply actions  

I believe I read somewhere

but I probably misquoted it in some other thread at one point (which bothers me… I want to fix that mistake)… that his shots to SOG ratio is roughly similar to that of his time at Liverpool. He was taking a ton more shots then, and missing a bunch too, but you’ll not find that on the highlight reels, so unless they opt to show some old games on TV or anyone actually watched his old matches, they probably don’t even think about that.

by alynne4307 on Jan 22, 2012 9:39 PM GMT up reply actions  

Sabrina basically said it

(but I felt the obligation to reply to your wall or text myself personally ;)) If Fernando Torres had been 12 goals to his name this season … or … let alone be Chelsea’s top scorer – nobody will say anything about that miss, or many other misses, or complain he much he sucks when he had a chance and the GK performs a godlike Cech-alike safe to deny him. And scoring on a regular basis also means fans have the expectation he’ll make up for it in the future. Not only RVP FVP … Lewandowski for BVB missed a sitter too, but with 14 goals he is their top-scorer. That’s the difference

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 22, 2012 9:21 PM GMT up reply actions  

I'm happy with assists....

…but there aren’t really enough of those either. He just isn’t fast enough. How the hell is someone supposed to deliver him the ball if he has a defender all over him? And on those occasions he manages to get it then he loses it cheaply anyway. You have no Idea how much I’d like him to do well! But I’m realistic enough to realize that he’s had enough time to get off the schneid and it’s time to try something else.

by ososdeoro on Jan 23, 2012 4:59 AM GMT up reply actions  

Yeah I know ;)

Wall of text and nobody’s gonna read that sh*t

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 22, 2012 8:57 PM GMT up reply actions  

I did!

It’s my walls of text no one reads… I’m alright with that. Half the time my rambles are for catharsis :)

I thought your comment above makes a lot of sense, actually. I am at a place where I just get tired of seeing things here (because I’ve sort of held this place as a sane fan territory) that are the same things that the press spew, because it’s just boring me to tears. I’d be truly disappointed if I chose to latch onto a team where my fellow fans would be as stubborn and unwilling to think twice about things as some other of the teams I’d my pick of.

by alynne4307 on Jan 22, 2012 9:04 PM GMT up reply actions  

It's sad to say that

but I have gone to simply ignore comments I think they’re not worth replying to. And sadly – I tend to read the username below a comment first before deciding whether or not to read the actual comment. Not the fine way, surely, but it saves me time and nerves

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 22, 2012 9:23 PM GMT up reply actions  

I'm coming to that point

it’s better for my sanity. Because overall, the Chelsea fans here are pretty reasonable people.

by alynne4307 on Jan 22, 2012 9:35 PM GMT up reply actions  

It's a bit sad to admit it

that mostly from the username you can judge if that comment is worth reading or not (I’ll include myself in that category :D) but then, I think that makes life easier for everyone. We can all write what we like and decide what’s worth reading (and replying) and what’s notq

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 22, 2012 9:36 PM GMT up reply actions  

I'm more likely to read your walls of text than most...

You tend to make some actual points in your writing, so it’s often worth a look :p

by deg0ey on Jan 22, 2012 9:25 PM GMT up reply actions  

Those "inside reports" often come in wall of texts

so I was just curious … :D

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 22, 2012 9:37 PM GMT up reply actions  

Ah that sh*t wallpaper thread

it’s dust and buried now it seems :P

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 22, 2012 9:43 PM GMT up reply actions  

That sucks.

Somewhere there in a memory slot deep in my mind! ;)
Muses on…
You know I wish we’d had signed Schweinsteiger…

by Garrincha7 on Jan 22, 2012 9:46 PM GMT up reply actions  

Thanks to both of you

but I don’t wanna make a new one because that would be SERIOUS TROLLING :D

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 22, 2012 9:51 PM GMT up reply actions  

Putting up the same fanpost

IS serious trolling. In forums, mods or admins will ban you for that :P

@Garrincha: yeah you can just write anywhere when you want a nother wallpaper. I have one request going (still haven’t forgotten about it, just no tools doing it) and will come up anytime – and added to that, you have my mailadress, too :P

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 22, 2012 10:00 PM GMT up reply actions  

Should I say

“thanks” or “aaaaarrgggh” now? :P I guess the first, since I don’t wanna kicked out by DPeezy :P

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 22, 2012 10:06 PM GMT up reply actions  

I thought that was..

“bumping” or “duplicate posts”. My days of forum moderation seem to be further back than I thought… I can’t even remember the terms :(

by alynne4307 on Jan 22, 2012 10:12 PM GMT up reply actions  

Well the admins setup the rules

so there are no universal one

I’m posting in numerous forums across the internet world and I don’t know no one in which posting the same topic wouldn’t be considered as bad bad trolling earning you an instant ban :P

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 22, 2012 10:18 PM GMT up reply actions  

The buyout clause is sometimes combined with a fair share

of conspiracy theories … AVB not liking youth … the management not liking youth … Drogba hating Torres … Malouda hating Torres … maybe the Hazard buyout clause is just part of it?

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 22, 2012 9:38 PM GMT up reply actions  

I did!

And contributed a little wall of my own,too :P

by Avinash Mohan on Jan 22, 2012 9:08 PM GMT via mobile up reply actions  

Whenever Torres doesn't score, I die a little inside. :(

I’ve been a fan of Torres for a long time. I think its not totally his fault that he’s not scoring. Its a mixture of poor form, bad luck, not adjusting with the team, pressure, great GK saves, etc.

by Gautam Cfc on Jan 22, 2012 9:32 PM GMT reply actions  

I agree

If I believed in karma, I’d say that he must have done something terrible before, like cheated on his wife, or killed a man lol

by dodgerboy03 on Jan 22, 2012 11:57 PM GMT up reply actions  

Not being able to score as a punishment for

killing a man … oohh …

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 22, 2012 11:58 PM GMT up reply actions  

I wanna be there!

And have gone to Mallorca with them..I could help Fernando, Juan, and Oriol translate for the rest of the guys!

And just hanging out with them in generally would be amazing.

by dodgerboy03 on Jan 22, 2012 11:58 PM GMT up reply actions  

You mean

Mallorquins have forgotten how to speak Spanish after years of German occupation

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 23, 2012 12:00 AM GMT up reply actions  

Oh it's late obviously

I thought you meant other guys translating for Torres, Mata and Romeu … Mallorca is rumoured to be under German occupation :D

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 23, 2012 12:16 AM GMT up reply actions  

i've defended torres as much as anyone for the last year

i genuinely like him, i know he is trying really hard, and i think most of the criticism has been wildly unfair. he has put in some really good performances and he has created his fair share of goals. that said, i think we are starting to get to a point where a change of scenery might do everyone some good. we need a striker that we can count on to score every game, like RVP or Kun. didier can’t do it anymore, and fernando certainly can’t do it.

i don’t know if the answer is moving sturridge into the middle and buying a winger, or buying a winger and buying another striker, or if we have to reshuffle the formation. whatever the conclusion is, i am starting to doubt if torres will ever be a successful part of it.

if malaga or PSG come in with a good offer, i think we have to take it. i never would have said that before, but i think it helps the team and it helps fernando.

by jags 1981 on Jan 22, 2012 9:37 PM GMT reply actions  

Part of the problem is that there's so little value at striker right now.

I don’t think there are more than ten you’d count as “elite” any more.

Author and Official Fernando Torres Apologist for We Ain't Got No History!

by Kevin Kostka on Jan 22, 2012 9:39 PM GMT up reply actions  

I can give you at least 10 I'd rather have on my squad.

No particular order.

Demba Ba
Robin Van Persie
Mario Balotelli
Kun Aguero
Edinson Cavani
Hulk
Gonzalo Higuain
Benzema
Welbeck
Rooney
Mario Gomez
Soldado
Ibrahimovic
Seydou Doumbia

That’s just off the top of my head.

by Mourinho on Jan 22, 2012 10:00 PM GMT up reply actions  

Ba was a free transfer, and Tony Pulis rejected him.

Its easy to name him in your elite strikers list after he’s scored some goals.

by Gautam Cfc on Jan 22, 2012 10:02 PM GMT up reply actions  

Isn't that the criteria for a striker?

SCORE GOALS! Or is that lost on you since we haven’t had one capable of that since Drogba turned 33

by Mourinho on Jan 22, 2012 10:06 PM GMT up reply actions  

Given that

then sure Andy Carroll was a fine purchase for Pool the day he signed. He was scoring many goals

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 22, 2012 10:09 PM GMT up reply actions  

I'm not saying he is good or bad

just “scoring goals” was the only parameter you gave for an “elite striker”, and in this regard, Pool were right to have shed a lot of money for someone who would fall under your “elite striker” category with your qualifications

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 22, 2012 10:19 PM GMT up reply actions  

TWO important games in a season?

In some weeks? In some days? In some months? Because if I take you literally there will be no elite striker

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 22, 2012 10:28 PM GMT up reply actions  

Just look at Drogba, in the big games and under pressure he comes good

He misses a lot of easy chances but scores enough to not make it matter. (I’m talking about when Drogba from a few seasons ago). Torres NEVER scores, so his missing easy chances is not justified.

The Nigerian Perspective!

by Iced O on Jan 22, 2012 10:38 PM GMT up reply actions  

I think I have been repetitive for some hours now

But I have written a whole wall of text about this and I get Graham/Stephen’s laser on the space between my eyes once I post that same wall again so I just don’t do it. My text is somewhere above (and probably the longest comment in this section so far – except deg0ey’s fabulous attempt)

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 22, 2012 10:41 PM GMT up reply actions  

To be honest, I think making a decent point...

…even as a wall of text, and more then once is unlikely to get the laser.

Author and Official Fernando Torres Apologist for We Ain't Got No History!

by Kevin Kostka on Jan 22, 2012 10:43 PM GMT up reply actions  

I just thought my big long comment was a perfect answer to his

but space is narrow here and posting it … I don’t know. If he’s interested in a reply – the comment is still there. If not – not worth wasting his time

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 22, 2012 10:45 PM GMT up reply actions  

That makes sense, but you'd probably only get...

…the laser if you only ever made comments like the first one in the thread.

Author and Official Fernando Torres Apologist for We Ain't Got No History!

by Kevin Kostka on Jan 22, 2012 10:47 PM GMT up reply actions  

And even that survived

OK – one question about rules and such: I guess insulting other fans verbally in the comments is not allowed, right?

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 22, 2012 10:48 PM GMT up reply actions  

Pretty much.

I think you’d get a warning or two, if it’s heated and not a very bad offence, but otherwise it’s pretty relaxed here.

Author and Official Fernando Torres Apologist for We Ain't Got No History!

by Kevin Kostka on Jan 22, 2012 10:50 PM GMT up reply actions  

Yes I just asked because

there were some ugly wordings flying around yesterday in the game thread. Was sad to see. Absolutely not nice :(

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 22, 2012 10:51 PM GMT up reply actions  

From myself included.

GameThreads generally have more lax rules, though, since comments are made during a period of high emotion.

Author and Official Fernando Torres Apologist for We Ain't Got No History!

by Kevin Kostka on Jan 22, 2012 10:54 PM GMT up reply actions  

True

but insulting other people isn’t OK, either … even in the heat of an argument. That’s just silly

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 22, 2012 10:59 PM GMT up reply actions  

Agreed.

I try to stop myself, but it’s hard sometimes.

Author and Official Fernando Torres Apologist for We Ain't Got No History!

by Kevin Kostka on Jan 22, 2012 11:00 PM GMT up reply actions  

That's why we're football fans.

Football is a passionate sport and attracts passionate people!

Hugs. :D

The Nigerian Perspective!

by Iced O on Jan 22, 2012 11:01 PM GMT up reply actions  

What

we didn’t fight?

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 22, 2012 11:01 PM GMT up reply actions  

"We" fought in the game thread

a few people stayed calm, and tried. Many, and me, were frustrated. Others went amok. There was blood everywhere /irony

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 22, 2012 11:05 PM GMT up reply actions  

Maybe I am,

maybe I’m not. You have to find out

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 22, 2012 11:09 PM GMT up reply actions  

I KNOW

nothing

The Nigerian Perspective!

by Iced O on Jan 22, 2012 11:10 PM GMT up reply actions  

Why would I care?

You’re a Chelsea fan, good enough for me.

by Gautam Cfc on Jan 22, 2012 11:10 PM GMT up reply actions  

True talk

The Nigerian Perspective!

by Iced O on Jan 22, 2012 11:11 PM GMT up reply actions  

Yes, when I wrote my wall of text 2-3 hours earlier

to comment on this article I thought I’d just sign off and go play some DotA matches, or go do some modding. But then, it got more and more. And now, we’re guessing if I’m a girl or a guy. Hilarious. What an evening. I blame Kevin for putting up this article. Or Fernando Torres. Or David Luiz. Take your pick

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 22, 2012 11:15 PM GMT up reply actions  

Oh sorry for adding confusion

but Kevin himself personally allowed me to call him that because I can’t learn his screen name (and I always type mbx)

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 22, 2012 11:20 PM GMT up reply actions  

That would be me.

Kevin is my real name.

Author and Official Fernando Torres Apologist for We Ain't Got No History!

by Kevin Kostka on Jan 22, 2012 11:17 PM GMT up reply actions  

I don't hate them as much as some...

…but no, I’m a different guy. Would you prefer I apply to have my name changed to my real name like Graham and Stephen?

Author and Official Fernando Torres Apologist for We Ain't Got No History!

by Kevin Kostka on Jan 22, 2012 11:22 PM GMT up reply actions  

It would help some

nut it would confuse many others and that would be funny so yes do it. :cD

by Sabrina Dessipe on Jan 22, 2012 11:23 PM GMT up reply actions  

I thought you were talking about

Changing your real name to Graham or Stephen for a second.

I was a little confused about how that would help :p

by deg0ey on Jan 22, 2012 11:23 PM GMT up reply actions  

If could be any name that I can type

properly … or even “Mygirlfriend/wifecheatsmewithFernandoTorres” – this I can certainly remember – actually this is the pure and simple reason I started reading this site regularly! It’s your fault! :P

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 22, 2012 11:27 PM GMT up reply actions  

Oh, hi Kevin!

The Nigerian Perspective!

by Iced O on Jan 22, 2012 11:19 PM GMT up reply actions  

I already suck playing online!

I’d suck so much more! DL I hate you for that! :P

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 22, 2012 11:21 PM GMT up reply actions  

LOL

The Nigerian Perspective!

by Iced O on Jan 22, 2012 11:23 PM GMT up reply actions  

Yeah, being harsh

and offending is one thing, just calling names/insulting directly is another thing. It shocked me a bit :(

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 22, 2012 11:01 PM GMT up reply actions  

This morning where? In the game thread?

The spurs fans at CFC got mad at me :c( I was just trying to be nice after they lost.

by Sabrina Dessipe on Jan 22, 2012 11:04 PM GMT up reply actions  

Spurs fans are just more touchy

I can still be cool with you guys after you lose.

by Sabrina Dessipe on Jan 22, 2012 11:07 PM GMT up reply actions  

Well try supporting Fernando Torres

and feel how “friendly” Chelsea fans can get! :P

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 22, 2012 11:07 PM GMT up reply actions  

Just sayin'

that will earn you Chelsea fans b*tching at you nearly immediately … it’s even proportional! The more you “love” Torres, the more they’ll come b*tching

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 22, 2012 11:10 PM GMT up reply actions  

I love him a lot to be honest.

He was my top scorer in FIFA 08 when I played with Bayern Munich.

by Gautam Cfc on Jan 22, 2012 11:11 PM GMT up reply actions  

CFC?

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 22, 2012 11:06 PM GMT up reply actions  

I get a laugh out of that all the time.

Their blog, while a fitting name, has the initials CFC.

Author and Official Fernando Torres Apologist for We Ain't Got No History!

by Kevin Kostka on Jan 22, 2012 11:08 PM GMT up reply actions  

Yeah it confused me too

They’d always refer the the blog as CFC and I’d think they were talking about Chelsea lol

by Sabrina Dessipe on Jan 22, 2012 11:09 PM GMT up reply actions  

It would be another reason to combine...

…into Charsenal FC. They’d have to change the name of their blog. Unfortunately, we’d have to close The Short Fuse. We Ain’t Got No History would be much more fitting for a merged club. : )

Author and Official Fernando Torres Apologist for We Ain't Got No History!

by Kevin Kostka on Jan 22, 2012 11:12 PM GMT up reply actions  

Yeah but then

You guys and TSF guys can do a podcast and that would be pretty boss!

by Sabrina Dessipe on Jan 22, 2012 11:16 PM GMT up reply actions  

That would be awesome.

After this thread dies down, I’m going to go to the FM Editor and make Charsenal FC.

Should I put up an article where people can tell me which 25 they’d keep in the combined team.

Author and Official Fernando Torres Apologist for We Ain't Got No History!

by Kevin Kostka on Jan 22, 2012 11:19 PM GMT up reply actions  

?*

Damn no editing!

Author and Official Fernando Torres Apologist for We Ain't Got No History!

by Kevin Kostka on Jan 22, 2012 11:19 PM GMT up reply actions  

That'd be a fun article

Maybe, you could make it where we decide who you buy, your tactics and teams and then you tell us the results

The Nigerian Perspective!

by Iced O on Jan 22, 2012 11:20 PM GMT up reply actions  

That would be biggest merger

in football corporate history! That alone is HISTORY!!!self

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 22, 2012 11:16 PM GMT up reply actions  

Oh OK

I initially thought cfc-net but then – why should you go to that bl**** hole? :D

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 22, 2012 11:08 PM GMT up reply actions  

There was a thread this morning...

…for the City-Spuds, Utd-Arsenal matches. I didn’t know about it, so I missed it.

Author and Official Fernando Torres Apologist for We Ain't Got No History!

by Kevin Kostka on Jan 22, 2012 11:07 PM GMT up reply actions  

That was civil

and I watched BVB and HSV, so obviously I didn’t read all that Manure/Arsenal/Spuds/City related parts when I was enjoying a very nice game and typing in those lovely names :P

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 22, 2012 11:09 PM GMT up reply actions  

After I left the game thread yesterday

there was no post there. Hm … what did I do :P

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 22, 2012 11:06 PM GMT up reply actions  

I though it was important what sh*t I post

and not what chromosomes I’ve got? /grin

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 22, 2012 11:11 PM GMT up reply actions  

rofl!

Which reminds me what mean spurs fan said at CFC called me “hardly a girl” ha-rumph

by Sabrina Dessipe on Jan 22, 2012 11:14 PM GMT up reply actions  

It's funny, I think WAGNH and...

…TSF are two of the nicest football blogs here.

Author and Official Fernando Torres Apologist for We Ain't Got No History!

by Kevin Kostka on Jan 22, 2012 11:15 PM GMT up reply actions  

The Short Fuse.

The Arsenal blog for SBNation.

Author and Official Fernando Torres Apologist for We Ain't Got No History!

by Kevin Kostka on Jan 22, 2012 11:16 PM GMT up reply actions  

Don't be silly

This site is actually just a front for an amateur genetics lab. Your chromosomes are all we care about.

by deg0ey on Jan 22, 2012 11:15 PM GMT up reply actions  

OMG

That’s why Graham/Stephen didn’t hit out the Laser at me!

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 22, 2012 11:17 PM GMT up reply actions  

The ionizing radiation would...

…alter your chromosomes.

Author and Official Fernando Torres Apologist for We Ain't Got No History!

by Kevin Kostka on Jan 22, 2012 11:20 PM GMT up reply actions  

That's convenient to know

next time I see someone saying things I disagree with I just jump in and shout “you damn stupid motherf*cking c*nt” yeah!

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 22, 2012 11:23 PM GMT up reply actions  

And that would explain too

why Sabrina didn’t get the shot, despite “serious trolling”

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 22, 2012 11:17 PM GMT up reply actions  

*Cough* She is...

Author and Official Fernando Torres Apologist for We Ain't Got No History!

by Kevin Kostka on Jan 22, 2012 10:50 PM GMT up reply actions  

Composure.

Strength(in a 4-3-3 particularly)
Determination(Like Sturridge)
Agility
Finishing is number one though

by Mourinho on Jan 22, 2012 10:31 PM GMT up reply actions  

How many of those are...

A) Available at a decent price?
2) Under 25?
D) Likely to join us?

There are very few in that list, and some I wouldn’t put in a list of elite strikers, Ba for example. Nando’s not there either, of course.

Author and Official Fernando Torres Apologist for We Ain't Got No History!

by Kevin Kostka on Jan 22, 2012 10:03 PM GMT up reply actions  

I've read that as well

I believe that article said it only applies to the summer window though. ewcastle seem to want to give him a new contract before that comes and deal with that little goof.

by Stephen Schmidt on Jan 22, 2012 10:57 PM GMT up reply actions  

And add

3) with good prospects to play well at Chelsea?

I don’t get along with your number system …

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 22, 2012 10:08 PM GMT up reply actions  

That would be point four.

You can make it whatever you like, but I do “?”

Author and Official Fernando Torres Apologist for We Ain't Got No History!

by Kevin Kostka on Jan 22, 2012 10:09 PM GMT up reply actions  

First of all that's not what you said.

I would agree they are hard to snatch up but to say there are a shortage is just wrong… Those are the names I came up with off the top of my head I’m sure if I actually dug I’d find a whole lot more.

A) Was Torres a decent price? Money matters not here.
B) More than you know I’m sure!
C) That is not for me to speculate on, who would’ve thought Torres would want to play for us or Modric for that matter.

by Mourinho on Jan 22, 2012 10:12 PM GMT up reply actions  

To clarify.

A) I wouldn’t have put Torres on that list a year ago.
2) I’m not sure how many top striker prospects are coming through at the moment.
D) I don’t mean want to play for us. I mean, are they likely to leave their current club, and is there another club more likely to land them?

When I say “elite” I don’t mean “Better than Torres” I mean elite. There are very few really good strikers out there at the moment.

Author and Official Fernando Torres Apologist for We Ain't Got No History!

by Kevin Kostka on Jan 22, 2012 10:16 PM GMT up reply actions  

I don't know if your definition of ELITE

is actually what we need to be successful. I would take Tons of guys right now over Torres simply because they are plenty out there with a better mentality and more composure. He’s talented but his head is just not right…

by Mourinho on Jan 22, 2012 10:19 PM GMT up reply actions  

I would agree

I also thing supporting him is cute because I feel really bad for him

by Graham MacAree on Jan 22, 2012 10:19 PM GMT up reply actions  

Why do you keep harping on this?

Demba Ba to me is an elite level striker… Carroll not so much sometimes half a season is enough and other times a bit rash! From what I’ve seen of Ba I think he possesses the skills to be clinical in front of goal.

Cool?

by Mourinho on Jan 22, 2012 10:25 PM GMT up reply actions  

There's just an 11 month difference in Ba and Torres's ages.

Rather than comparing their careers, you’re just forming the conclusion based on half a season. That’s was isn’t cool.

Ba may be a better player than Torres currently.

by Gautam Cfc on Jan 22, 2012 10:33 PM GMT up reply actions  

But the third point is probably the main factor

not is the guy willing or not to play for us – sure many players don’t mind playing for us because they’re more or less “mercenaries” – but most guys on your list will never move to us. The grass is always greener on the other side, and sure other clubs have good and better strikers. That doesn’t mean much for our standing

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 22, 2012 10:22 PM GMT up reply actions  

My definition of what we need is:

A striker who can come here and lead the line and play most games for a minimum of 3-5 years. There is a real lack of guys like that out there for 25-40m at the moment. We can’t keep spending that much on one position all the time, so we can’t take too big a risk. Maybe the answer is to buy a bunch of more short-term guys cheaply, like Ba, but I’d rather have a long-term plan at striker.

Author and Official Fernando Torres Apologist for We Ain't Got No History!

by Kevin Kostka on Jan 22, 2012 10:26 PM GMT up reply actions  

I'd say

[fun] Balotelli..I wouldn’t want him playing for Chelsea if he was scoring 20 a season

Unless he cleaned up his behavior a lot

by dodgerboy03 on Jan 22, 2012 11:51 PM GMT up reply actions  

This brings me to the question that

Who, out of Drogs, Nando, Kalou and Malouda has more chances of leaving in the next transfer window, and in which order?
(I know I asked the same question yesterday as well but I’m just curious)

by Gautam Cfc on Jan 22, 2012 9:42 PM GMT up reply actions  

I assume you mean in the summer.

In that case, I’d say:

A) Kalou – Out of contract, won’t get another.
2) Drogba – Out of contract, probably won’t sign another.
D) Malouda – Not good enough any more, wrong style of play
?) Torres – Depends on replacements available, how he plays until then.

Author and Official Fernando Torres Apologist for We Ain't Got No History!

by Kevin Kostka on Jan 22, 2012 9:49 PM GMT up reply actions  

Yes I meant summer.

So there are chances that we sell all 4 of those in the same window.

by Gautam Cfc on Jan 22, 2012 9:52 PM GMT up reply actions  

Torres is probably a low chance.

Kalou and Drogba will probably walk, and Malouda probably has no place here any more. Torres seems more likely to be given another year, unless his form really takes a dive in the second half of the year, or an elite striker becomes available for a decent price.

Author and Official Fernando Torres Apologist for We Ain't Got No History!

by Kevin Kostka on Jan 22, 2012 9:54 PM GMT up reply actions  

I think I answered as well

but here are my 2 (euro!) Cents :P

Kalou – we might offer him a contract but with the first team starting situation he might wanna move on
Malouda – won’t get another contract, or won’t sign either because of first team situation
Drogba – will get a one year extension but possibly doesn’t sign it
Torres – can’t believe we’d sell him in the summer … regardless of performance … and can’t believe we can do serious business with him so it would leave cancelling the contract as the only remaining opportunity. That won’t happen this summer

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 22, 2012 9:54 PM GMT up reply actions  

Won't he be in the summer?

I thought that was the reason why he was campaigning for an extension

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 22, 2012 10:01 PM GMT up reply actions  

I agree, but only if there's a good striker available for 25-40m.

I don’t really see one coming available.

Author and Official Fernando Torres Apologist for We Ain't Got No History!

by Kevin Kostka on Jan 22, 2012 9:58 PM GMT up reply actions  

If he continues to look dangerous, he'll score this season.

If not, he might be sold. I think he’ll probably get a loan first, though.

Author and Official Fernando Torres Apologist for We Ain't Got No History!

by Kevin Kostka on Jan 22, 2012 10:05 PM GMT up reply actions  

WTF?

he’s a 50M striker. He’s the most expensive striker in THE WORLD! I’m tired, Sturridge is better than him, I’m pretty sure LUKAKU is better than him, even Lucas Piazon, Kalou etc are all better than Torres right now (I watched Ivory Coast’s match and saw how Kalou played)

The Nigerian Perspective!

by Iced O on Jan 22, 2012 10:08 PM GMT up reply actions  

I'm sure Nando would look great against Sudan as well.

Right now, I’d pick Norwich over Sudan, quality-wise.

Author and Official Fernando Torres Apologist for We Ain't Got No History!

by Kevin Kostka on Jan 22, 2012 10:11 PM GMT up reply actions  

That's racist and a silly assumption

Did you watch the match? How the heck do you know?

The Nigerian Perspective!

by Iced O on Jan 22, 2012 10:12 PM GMT up reply actions  

My point was that just because they're Sudan does not mean they can't play football or lack quality

I should know, since my country could not even qualify. He made that assumption without knowing about the country hence the racist comment…

The Nigerian Perspective!

by Iced O on Jan 22, 2012 10:15 PM GMT up reply actions  

That's not racism

it has nothing to do with race or skin color.

by alynne4307 on Jan 22, 2012 10:16 PM GMT up reply actions  

While very true

Club teams are better than international teams (by a lot) and it’s not unreasonable to assume that a mid-level Premier League team is better than Sudan. It’s also fair, since Sudan weren’t great.

by Graham MacAree on Jan 22, 2012 10:17 PM GMT up reply actions  

LOL

Sudan suck… Come on dude.

by Mourinho on Jan 22, 2012 10:19 PM GMT up reply actions  

Whoa

do we all know what racism is?

by alynne4307 on Jan 22, 2012 10:15 PM GMT up reply actions  

That could be

or prejudice, or even just presumptuous, could be the case.

by alynne4307 on Jan 22, 2012 10:17 PM GMT up reply actions  

How is it racist?

Sudan are 120th in the FIFA rankings right now. I watch some short highlights on YouTube, and Sudan would struggle to stay in League 2 right now.

Author and Official Fernando Torres Apologist for We Ain't Got No History!

by Kevin Kostka on Jan 22, 2012 10:17 PM GMT up reply actions  

Fine, I apologise, Sudan sucks, but they qualified for ACON and Nigeria didn't so I'm a bit sore..

Let’s not drift away from the original point. Which is that Torres has done nothing to justify his transfer fee or wages!

The Nigerian Perspective!

by Iced O on Jan 22, 2012 10:22 PM GMT up reply actions  

I'm not sure Malaga really want him

it’s only rumours, isn’t it? And Torres might have a say in whether to move or not

And for being patient – we could opt to leave him on the bench / drop him to Siberia if he doesn’t perform to increase pressure on him. But that would be too ugly to be true – I hope a peaceful solution can be settled … annulling the contract would be fine, for instance

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 22, 2012 10:02 PM GMT up reply actions  

AGREED!

He’s been an absolute disaster. With the way the team is performing now we need a Striker who is much more clinical and not so slow to react in the box

by Mourinho on Jan 22, 2012 9:51 PM GMT up reply actions  

I have not read your article before making this comment.

After writing this, I will then read your article. First of all, Torres is a failure. That’s the truth. No getting around it, no hiding from it, just accept it. He needs to be sold. He does not deserve his wages. You might view this as an over reaction but seriously, it’s been 1 year! he’s never going to improve. Shevchenko was MUCH better than this failure.

What particularly makes me angry, is the hate other players like Mikel, Kalou and Malouda receive for CONTRIBUTING a whole lot MORE than Torres in the same time span. Even Bosingwa, Alex, Anelka, Ferriera, Hilario and Turnbull have all been more useful than Torres over the last year. Torres is a failure. He’s the 3rd (I may be wrong) most expensive player EVER and he has done nothing!

The Nigerian Perspective!

by Iced O on Jan 22, 2012 9:56 PM GMT reply actions  

So...

you may want to read the comments threads here more than you want to read the article. Because what you’ll find is that the differing opinions are on the comparative contributions of Torres and some of the other “misfits”. And you’ll see that a number of us just disagree on that front.

by alynne4307 on Jan 22, 2012 10:19 PM GMT up reply actions  

"us"

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 22, 2012 10:25 PM GMT up reply actions  

Which is my problem with some Chelsea fans on this site.

Torres is given an incredible ammount of leeway here. Anything he does is explained away as either “He’ll improve” “He’s getting there” “He’ll soon score”.

Seriously, he’s supposed to SCORE, that’s his job. He’s not supposed to ASSIST or complete PASSES but to freaking SCORE. If he can’t do that, then, frankly, he’s useless

The Nigerian Perspective!

by Iced O on Jan 22, 2012 10:25 PM GMT up reply actions  

What really annoyed me yesterday wasn't his misses

It was the fact that he couldn’t hold on to the ball or pass properly.

The Nigerian Perspective!

by Iced O on Jan 22, 2012 10:34 PM GMT up reply actions  

I see you still haven't read the article.

I did admit his movement was sub-par. His positioning and use of the ball was poor, even by his recent standards.

Author and Official Fernando Torres Apologist for We Ain't Got No History!

by Kevin Kostka on Jan 22, 2012 10:39 PM GMT up reply actions  

I really need to cool off

I shouldn’t have watched the ACON today because it made realise I really wanted Nigeria to be there. I’ve been feeling grumpy ever since. Of course, Torres didn’t help. :D

The Nigerian Perspective!

by Iced O on Jan 22, 2012 10:42 PM GMT up reply actions  

I can understand why it sucks that Nigeria missed out.

They really should have made it. Do they miss out next year too? I hope not.

Author and Official Fernando Torres Apologist for We Ain't Got No History!

by Kevin Kostka on Jan 22, 2012 10:46 PM GMT up reply actions  

Agreed.

but when we’re goal starved we need someone to finish and his name is at the top of that list

by Mourinho on Jan 22, 2012 10:27 PM GMT up reply actions  

Pfft

For another cool $50m, he is yours. We’ll have to pry him out of Newcastles dead cold hands, the way they do business.

by alynne4307 on Jan 22, 2012 10:30 PM GMT up reply actions  

Damnit

there I go with that dollar sign again. One day I’ll bother to look up the keystroke for the pound sign.

by alynne4307 on Jan 22, 2012 10:31 PM GMT up reply actions  

Well I'm only living

inches miles ages whatever away from the UK geographically … and my keyboard doesn’t bother … :( but! but! but! I have the dollar sign! Uh!

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 22, 2012 10:38 PM GMT up reply actions  

Sure you have your own currency

and those with which you trade the most (aren’t Eurozone and US UK’s most important trade partners? ;))

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 22, 2012 10:42 PM GMT up reply actions  

Erm I meant UK

but yes if I could afford it I visit the Maledives (that’s where you’re from, right?) too! But until that … Mallorca :P

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 22, 2012 10:50 PM GMT up reply actions  

Hehehe.. Thats fine with DL there!

For the record its Maldives though without an e between l and d. ;)

by Garrincha7 on Jan 22, 2012 10:52 PM GMT up reply actions  

Sorry

In German it’s actually “Malediven” so I assumed there was an E in the English version too …
It’s right deg0ey in case you come reading this – other people with other languages do kill other languages too! :D

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 22, 2012 10:57 PM GMT up reply actions  

Yay!

It’s not just me :-)

by deg0ey on Jan 22, 2012 10:58 PM GMT up reply actions  

Ohhh didn't know that!

Funny though.
Coz Male’ is our capital and Diven brings diving to my mind which is what a lot of tourists come over here for! ;)

by Garrincha7 on Jan 22, 2012 11:01 PM GMT up reply actions  

Diving?

Like Ronaldo or Steven Gerrard do? Ooooohh … did Ronaldo just come to your country and practiced that? ;)

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 22, 2012 11:04 PM GMT up reply actions  

To put that in context

How many goals are Van Persie, C. Ronaldo, Aguero, Wayne Rooney and Messi responsible for? Because as far as I’m concerned based on transfer fee and wages, those are the only players in the world comparable to Torres

The Nigerian Perspective!

by Iced O on Jan 22, 2012 10:31 PM GMT up reply actions  

You forget Eto'o

That greatest of strikers that Barca sent away!

by Garrincha7 on Jan 22, 2012 10:32 PM GMT up reply actions  

too

Where is the meatloaf?

by Habana on Jan 22, 2012 10:33 PM GMT up reply actions  

Alright guys i'm off to sleep (its 4 a.m here) I'll check the thread tomorrow.

Just let me know the current “elite” strikers of the world and if criticising a poorly playing country is racist. :D

by Gautam Cfc on Jan 22, 2012 10:28 PM GMT reply actions  

You forgot the wall of text though

that’s mandatory :P

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 22, 2012 10:34 PM GMT up reply actions  

And for decorating reasons

add the conspiracies … AVB doesn’t like youth, Malouda refuses to pass to Torres, Didier Drogba is selfish, Sturridge doesn’t want to perform with Torres on the pitch …

We’re nasty to an absent guy

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 22, 2012 10:39 PM GMT up reply actions  

Oh man.

Author and Official Fernando Torres Apologist for We Ain't Got No History!

by Kevin Kostka on Jan 22, 2012 10:37 PM GMT up reply actions  

Sorry for my Racist comment. It was said in the heat of anger.

Sudan DOES suck when compared to other countries, however, I don’t see the comparison between a country and club…

Anyway, I feel it’s vastly unfair the amount of hatred and anger directed at players that have contributed TONS more than Torres over the same 1 year period. I feel everyone should be treated equally especially Torres! This article is part of that problem…

The Nigerian Perspective!

by Iced O on Jan 22, 2012 10:49 PM GMT reply actions  

I'm the first one who encourages people to write articles defending those other players.

Before I started doing these, Torres was starting to get a lot of hate too.

Author and Official Fernando Torres Apologist for We Ain't Got No History!

by Kevin Kostka on Jan 22, 2012 10:52 PM GMT up reply actions  

Yeah, but that hate is JUSTIFIED

that’s my point. There should be justification for the hate. I’m not saying we shouldn’t hate them

The Nigerian Perspective!

by Iced O on Jan 22, 2012 10:54 PM GMT up reply actions  

I would say that.

I don’t think we should hate anyone, much less our own players.

Author and Official Fernando Torres Apologist for We Ain't Got No History!

by Kevin Kostka on Jan 22, 2012 10:56 PM GMT up reply actions  

I think the hate is understandable

but hating our own players is never justified. That applies for any other Chelsea players, too, especially Kalou after Valencia away

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 22, 2012 10:58 PM GMT up reply actions  

So your problem is

that Torres was a Liverpool player at some point of time in his career??
If he would have forever played for Chelsea and was now having an off season it would be fine for you because he contributed before???
I can’t understand someone getting freaked for Torres not scoring…but I can’t understand why everyone has to always say ‘he hasn’t done anything for the club’…

by msreya on Jan 22, 2012 11:22 PM GMT via mobile up reply actions  

Thats right though I guess a lot of it is in the heat of the moment..

The same people would earlier/later be idolising Drogs :D
Atleast I think so!

by Garrincha7 on Jan 22, 2012 10:58 PM GMT reply actions  

True ...

layout … not being able to edit … no smilies … stupid peoplearticles being a pile of rubbishFernando Torres

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 22, 2012 11:13 PM GMT up reply actions   1 recs

lol

The Nigerian Perspective!

by Iced O on Jan 22, 2012 11:14 PM GMT up reply actions  

It's something I learned anew

Normally I’d used a different word …

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 22, 2012 11:30 PM GMT up reply actions  

Instead of laser?

I thought that was the same in German…

by deg0ey on Jan 22, 2012 11:32 PM GMT up reply actions  

Haha

nobody noticed I used German words in the non-Chelsea gamethread today? :P well once or twice

I normally don’t use laser … don’t know! Chainlightning is so much cooler!

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 22, 2012 11:34 PM GMT up reply actions  

What's so confusing about

chainlightning? ;)

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 22, 2012 11:36 PM GMT up reply actions  

Stop trolling me Maiev

You’ve been taking lessons from Sabrina, haven’t you

by deg0ey on Jan 22, 2012 11:37 PM GMT up reply actions  

Ouch

And I just added an ;) for goodness’ sake!

Now I’m hurt. I walk into my corner :(

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 22, 2012 11:38 PM GMT up reply actions  

But I'm a guy!

Alright, agree we’d leave it here … remember kids this is a football blog and we not discuss all those heavy topics here :P:D /irony

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 22, 2012 11:41 PM GMT up reply actions   1 recs

I think the...

…“/irony” applies to the subject line too.

If not, you just lost your trolling crown.

Author and Official Fernando Torres Apologist for We Ain't Got No History!

by Kevin Kostka on Jan 22, 2012 11:43 PM GMT up reply actions  

I don't troll!

Never! :P

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 22, 2012 11:45 PM GMT up reply actions  

Only one thing to say


And yet again

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 22, 2012 11:43 PM GMT up reply actions  

I love that smiley

and I believe in English internet slang there is no “atomrofl” at all

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 22, 2012 11:44 PM GMT up reply actions  

Sometimes I write stupid things,

and people are upset. Sometimes I try to be funny so they aren’t. Fair deal for everyone

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 22, 2012 11:46 PM GMT up reply actions  

I don't think anyone is really upset...

They might just act like it for a little while

by deg0ey on Jan 22, 2012 11:46 PM GMT up reply actions  

Everytime anyone uses to reply in capital letters to me

I think he is upset. And I read that very often :P

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 22, 2012 11:49 PM GMT up reply actions  

Can you?

I’m sure Graham told I had to contact someone at SBN.

Author and Official Fernando Torres Apologist for We Ain't Got No History!

by Kevin Kostka on Jan 22, 2012 11:28 PM GMT up reply actions  

You could just change your screenname?

Just so? Oh …

Now I come to understand why SBN has those funny downtimes … /evil

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 22, 2012 11:31 PM GMT up reply actions  

That would be certainly interesting to know

how that comment box would look if smilies were incoporated

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 22, 2012 11:32 PM GMT up reply actions  

Sure - but more elements

incorporated need more scripts – more scripts slow the site down … and the site is sometimes incredibly down (imagine our 1600+ post gamethread!)

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 22, 2012 11:35 PM GMT up reply actions  

Don't change something with the session id cookies

I like the way how this site can operate without jamming your PC full with those … things :(

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 22, 2012 11:37 PM GMT up reply actions  

Not entirely my call

But as far as I know we’re not going to

by Graham MacAree on Jan 22, 2012 11:38 PM GMT up reply actions  

Me too I seriously doubt

Graham could implement smileys and post editing into this rigid and performance confuming script monster of SBN

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 22, 2012 11:19 PM GMT up reply actions  

Layout, yes

but since I’m used to forum systems this system is too rigid for my liking … since I’m always making horrendous mistakes I’d like to correct them, and I also like smilies to express irony, and most importantly – the possibility to quote without screwing up your own post! :D

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 22, 2012 11:24 PM GMT up reply actions  

This is thread that never ends!

Some people started commenting…

Author and Official Fernando Torres Apologist for We Ain't Got No History!

by Kevin Kostka on Jan 22, 2012 11:29 PM GMT up reply actions  

There's a song called. "The Song That Never Ends."

It’s pretty famous, at least in the U.S.

Author and Official Fernando Torres Apologist for We Ain't Got No History!

by Kevin Kostka on Jan 22, 2012 11:38 PM GMT up reply actions  

I don't know that

and seriously, I did nothing :P

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 22, 2012 11:40 PM GMT up reply actions  

+1 for me!

Author and Official Fernando Torres Apologist for We Ain't Got No History!

by Kevin Kostka on Jan 22, 2012 11:44 PM GMT up reply actions  

Ok, goodnight

The Nigerian Perspective!

by Iced O on Jan 22, 2012 11:31 PM GMT reply actions  

Probably not a bad plan

I’m not even entirely sure how this happened…

by deg0ey on Jan 22, 2012 11:43 PM GMT up reply actions  

Not really bad

since it would prevent us from hijacking serious football topics about Fernando Torres who somehow always turn out into … into … wait they are not fanfics? :P

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 22, 2012 11:44 PM GMT up reply actions  

What did we originally talk about on this thread?

Fernando Torres? Strikers? Scoring goals? Football? Seriously?

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 22, 2012 11:42 PM GMT reply actions  

Wait

I heard water was wet? ;D

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 22, 2012 11:45 PM GMT up reply actions  

I think we all united to fight the angry user, and it turned into chat.

Do you all still want me to do the Charsenal article. That would be good for chatting.

Author and Official Fernando Torres Apologist for We Ain't Got No History!

by Kevin Kostka on Jan 22, 2012 11:45 PM GMT up reply actions  

The angry guy? Who was that?

Did he land on the rubbish pile? /irony, no offense intended

If we do Charsenal – I’d do the M&A stuff! I’d be dreaming for years to land such a deal! :P

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 22, 2012 11:47 PM GMT up reply actions  

M&A?

I’m lost.

Author and Official Fernando Torres Apologist for We Ain't Got No History!

by Kevin Kostka on Jan 22, 2012 11:48 PM GMT up reply actions  

Of course.

I forget [Gender-specific pronoun 16 missing] was worked with law!

Author and Official Fernando Torres Apologist for We Ain't Got No History!

by Kevin Kostka on Jan 22, 2012 11:51 PM GMT up reply actions  

No!

You really remember the sh*t I post about myself? Iiiieeeks

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 22, 2012 11:51 PM GMT up reply actions  

Strangely enough

We actually pay attention to the things you say :p

by deg0ey on Jan 22, 2012 11:52 PM GMT up reply actions  

This is the INTERNET

nobody pays attention what others are saying because how could it be you could have a point?!

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 22, 2012 11:56 PM GMT up reply actions  

Mergers and Acquisitions

In other words: lawyers earning their money when a company wants to buy another company, or when two companies decide they wanna marry

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 22, 2012 11:51 PM GMT up reply actions  

Holy shite

I came back after cooking dinner and thought “168 new comments!”

Here I thought someone found some new point to interject into The Great Debate, ahaha.

by alynne4307 on Jan 22, 2012 11:48 PM GMT reply actions  

No we aren't

We’re still defending/flaming Fernando Torres

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 22, 2012 11:53 PM GMT up reply actions  

We're only spamming

and nothing else

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 22, 2012 11:52 PM GMT up reply actions  

Yeah they are

after slaying 127847839 dragons in polygons you get the idea

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 22, 2012 11:57 PM GMT up reply actions  

Yeah! I'd like to do that!

I’d like a lion with the canon too …

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 22, 2012 11:52 PM GMT up reply actions  

Yes

No it’s not me because that is a girl. I’m not a girl

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 22, 2012 11:57 PM GMT up reply actions  

You didn't see my Fernando Torres portrait?

Now I’m disappointed … corner … corner … :P

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 22, 2012 11:59 PM GMT up reply actions  

It's here

/showoff mode

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 23, 2012 12:02 AM GMT up reply actions  

That brings up a whole new question

about crossing two players to get the best.

What do you guys think would be the best combo?

by dodgerboy03 on Jan 23, 2012 12:04 AM GMT up reply actions  

Messi and Lukaku

Best combination of size and skillz

by deg0ey on Jan 23, 2012 12:05 AM GMT up reply actions  

Awesome

How long did that take?

by deg0ey on Jan 23, 2012 12:03 AM GMT up reply actions  

Long enough to get me insane

16 hours I think combined

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 23, 2012 12:04 AM GMT up reply actions  

GET you insane?

I thought you were insane already…

by deg0ey on Jan 23, 2012 12:05 AM GMT up reply actions  

At least I'm still supporting Chelsea!

How could that be insane?!

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 23, 2012 12:06 AM GMT up reply actions  

Why? Me I'm no Londoner

I’m just one of those many plastics from abroad who started supporting Chelsea when Abramovich came along who support Torres and not Chelsea insert other junk here it’s freestyle time

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 23, 2012 12:07 AM GMT up reply actions  

It's never Torres goodlooking

It’s me I’m made him this way – Alynne called it the Mona Lisa smile on Torres :P

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 23, 2012 12:10 AM GMT up reply actions  

I have

He’s from Cascais – I LOVE Cascais. If I’d be going to decide where I wanna die, it’d be Cascais

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 23, 2012 12:09 AM GMT up reply actions  

See

I told you that’s why you were here.

by deg0ey on Jan 23, 2012 12:10 AM GMT up reply actions  

Not sure if the majority of Arsenal or CHelsea fans

would be in favor of this merger… I mean if some were up in arms about moving stadiums then this might be a little much…

by Sabrina Dessipe on Jan 22, 2012 11:59 PM GMT reply actions  

My energy level is really crucially low now ...

sorry but I can’t keep up this :D

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 23, 2012 12:10 AM GMT reply actions  

Well surely I don't wanna go to sleep now

since I’m sure the next morning I’m coming to this site again, everything will be back normal and we will be talking about Chelsea … Fernando Torres … Spuds … AVB … ManCity … all over again … *sigh!

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 23, 2012 12:12 AM GMT up reply actions  

Indeed

Although I think that sleep might definitely be a good plan

by deg0ey on Jan 23, 2012 12:13 AM GMT up reply actions  

what you too?

I’m surprised Sir

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 23, 2012 12:15 AM GMT up reply actions  

I'm gone now ...

see you back tomorrow with some boring talk about Chelsea and football :P

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 23, 2012 12:17 AM GMT up reply actions  

Me too

I think we should consider this quite an achievement

by deg0ey on Jan 23, 2012 12:18 AM GMT up reply actions  

What

we were coddling Torres. Did you fail to notice?

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 23, 2012 10:12 AM GMT up reply actions  

I think we should refer to him as

The Artist Formerly Known As mpbx3003.

Or TAFKAM for short.

by deg0ey on Jan 23, 2012 12:50 AM GMT up reply actions  

I emailed, and they changed it in like half an hour.

In any case, the Charsenal thread is up! There are 20 things we need to decide before I can go ahead.

Author and Official Fernando Torres Apologist for We Ain't Got No History!

by Kevin Kostka on Jan 23, 2012 1:11 AM GMT up reply actions  

That SBN support

is damn damn damn fast. It’s even strange they get things done so quickly when you don’t know the admins personally! :D

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 23, 2012 10:16 AM GMT up reply actions  

So, um, 800 comments.

Torres was decent. He made some good plays, missed a really good chance, and we wouldn’t have anything bad to say about it if not for the whole “he’s gone 15 games without scoring.” It’s nice to see his overall game improving.

by Cablinasian on Jan 23, 2012 1:11 AM GMT reply actions  

I agree.

(wished there was 800 comments of pro-Torres comments)

by TheFan09 on Jan 23, 2012 2:46 AM GMT up reply actions  

There weren't?

Crap

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 23, 2012 10:17 AM GMT up reply actions  

Much ado about nothing

So the guy misses a sitter and people lose the plot.
Oh you mean this isn’t the first sitter he’s missed?
Well, shit.
I hope he’s scored a few other ones at least…
No?
…oh…
well…crap.

NEXT!

by DPeezy on Jan 23, 2012 6:36 AM GMT reply actions  

Couple choice quips from ESPN's The Fifth Official on Torres

Worth a chuckle:

Torres, again, was about as potent as a thimble of skimmed milk.
[…]
After a cheeky effort went close in the first half, Torres missed the sort of chance he used to gleefully gobble up in the red of Liverpool in the second, sending AVB into an upper-body epileptic fit.
It is the duty of either Chelsea or Liverpool to unite [Torres & Andy Carroll] and watch as they throw off the shackles of sluggery and instantly transform themselves into the free-scoring machines of yesteryear.

by DPeezy on Jan 23, 2012 6:41 PM GMT reply actions  

I expected many things from Torres signing...

I DID NOT expect him to give a worse goal return then Sheva did for us.

Shevchenko: 52(24) apps 21 goals
Torres: 27(15) apps 5 goals

So essentially Torres has started more then half of the matches then Sheva had, and in that time scored less then quarter of the goals. Meaning he’s only half as effective goalscoring wise.

Since Sheva only cost us 30.8 million pounds and Torres cost 50 million pounds I guess Sheva was actually a great deal ;)

by Sergey64 on Jan 23, 2012 9:54 PM GMT reply actions  

If Torres comes good for a CL run.

Or an FA cup run.

Or a League run.

All is forgiven. That’s the thing. We can whine and moan and complain about it as much as we want. But Torres has been put in just about the shittiest imaginable (non Inkoom Dnipro) situation.

I’m not happy with what we’ve seen from him, nobody is. But he has the talent to carry this team on his shoulders, and if he does it at a crucial enough time, he’ll be worth the terrific year and the 50m and more.

He’s not a bust until we give up on him and sell. If he knocks Barca out of the CL and/or possibly takes out one of about…all the Barca players. All’s forgotten, welcome home my son.

by Culain on Jan 23, 2012 10:06 PM GMT up reply actions  

I think it's rather meant figuratively ...

but Torres can’t knock out Barca on his own, Chelsea must do it altogether; as Sheva didn’t pull us all down alone (regardless how good or bad we’d rate him)

Tor ilisar'thera'nal!

by Maiev on Jan 23, 2012 10:16 PM GMT up reply actions  

It is time we give him a fresh start

I think that there has been too much focus on Torres. I love the guy, but I love the team more, so let’s look at the team. Our Center Forwards are suffering and to be honest they have been for a few season, notwithstanding the fact that two of the last three golden boots have come our way. There hasn’t been fluidity in our midfield since the departures of ballack, deco and cole. I know a lot will say Cole sucked at Liverpool so good riddance but not me, Cole in Chelsea blue was a marvel and that’s what matters to me. None of our CF’s are doing well and that can be attributed to a stagnant midfield and the lack of width. If you don’t have width, you need creativity, if you don’t have creativity you need width, we let go of duff and robben (our width) but we had Deco Belleti, Ballack and JCole, so we had vision and creativity, losing those meant that we have no width and no creativity so Torres is not scoring, and neither is drogba, Our midfield is scoring more than our center forwards, that is not good as it means that while the midfield is looking to score, they leave our defense vulnerable when we lose possession. So lets start afresh, hopefully with midfield additions and see how Torres does.

by GianfrancoZola on Jan 24, 2012 9:04 AM GMT reply actions  

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